Thoughts

"Success is never final, Failure is never fatal, but its the courage to carry on that counts" - another one of those really incredibly CHEESY lines from great people found in Call Of Duty 2.. Question is.. have I ever succeeded? and is failure really non lethal? Another great general also said that "There were only 2 outcomes in battle- Victory or Death" another incredibly cheesy thing to say... which makes me wonder why great men say all these kinda stuff..

It does make me wonder whether failure being never fatal was a merciful thing in the first place.. because falling from your own graces sometimes feels like you're shot thru the heart.. most of the times these failures, and thankfully so, are never bear physical.. but emotional scars.. Tho if failure were fatal, I'd think we'd have very short lives.. yet to let wounds heal and stand up to get shot again.. it would really require nerve and courage.. sometimes I wish i had that..

There are times when I've asked myself what is it i fear most and what is it that i desire most... really delving into the framework of my mind... Fear itself, is like an assassin and a saboteur.. killing hopes and the destroyer of dreams.. betraying us of our true potential... yet no man lives in the absence of fear.. only in the conquering of fear does a man triumph to live his dreams... Fear I guess reminds us once again that we're only human... In desiring we throw ourselves at our goals, pursue them with fervour.. and sometimes the fire of our passion becomes an obsession and caught in these flames we burn to destruction with it... only in pursuing it with hope and meekness and with courage and determination will we find satisfaction- not that we would definitely achieve our goal.. but the journey would be worthwhile..

"Jealousy is the one eye monster that doth feeds upon its own flesh"- an excerpt taken from the book Othello.. In this life I couldnt but find this true.. jealousy has many times destroyed and fed on my own flesh (not literally.. else i'd never have to go for TAF club) its an insane emotion whereby your lack of something u so desire causes damage to yourself.. and also fuels your fervour to pursue your lack...jealousy- a manifestation of an emotional insecurity? perhaps so.. It'd be vain to hope that I will never experience jealousy... in this world where the only way is forward, the only quality to exist is BETTER.. its hard to find contentment.. I only pray that somehow I do.. and stop this inner burning and destruction of me inside.."

Pardon this entry if its really emo.. in all seriousness.. its just a couple of my thoughts..

A "brief" summary of Kenchin's life

Ever wondered how time passed so quickly and you're starting to feel old? Well this's a little soliloquy of my own life.. just not as dramatic as Hamlet's. Whilst his starts with "To be or not to be..", mine will end with "The Best Is Yet To Be"...

Chapter 1: To where it all begins

-Its a hellzone here.. billions of my other friends are dying around me.. poor fellas.. whoever said this dammed place was like paradise? Anyway, no sympathy for those suckers.. I'm still alive so far.. not too bad at all! for 1500 ATP points I think I can top this season's "Who wants to be Fertilized" gameshow... but will someone get me out of this mess QUICKLY...

-I banged my head into this huge dammed thing.. hurts like hell! why did everyone else seem to be doing the same thing? not only that.. but REPEATEDLY? yet somehow after that hard knock, I got swallowed in by that thingy.. Oh dammit I gotta stop drinking...

-Its been quite a comfortable nine months inside this wierd place.. I hear some voices sayin I've gotta get out of there soon? Oh screw them.. I'm stayin here.. Anyway whats this Cesarian Section thingy they were talking about?

-Its the 9th of December today.. shit.. they got me out.. there was some movement around and suddenly there was a tear and light came in! some really bright lights! and there was this dude with totally uncool clothes and a face mask there to pull me out... They cut my umbilical cord thingy.. I'm just freaking glad they didnt cut the wrong thing by accident.. Anyway somehow I'm begining to like it out here.. feels different tho..

Chapter 2: First Steps

- I've learnt this incredibly new amazing thing called WALKING! and by making some random noises, mom and dad think i'm the smartest kid on earth cos I can do this thing called TALK.. Damm it feels good to keep being praised and praised... yes everyone should love me! mom and dad're competing to see whos name I say first.. man the attention is just so... coool.. :)

= To be continued =

Hard Core Pawn

2006 past

~ Ode to the year past~

Life isnt exactly a bed of roses.. but i guess we make do with the best we can..

...Especially with girls around...

...Thru the year, there are times when you just feel down and out...

...Times when you feel like a fish outta the water...

...Times when you are a bloody joker...

...And friends can be very encouraging...

...Sometimes abit too encouraging...

...nevermind...

..But friends have always been there...

...Always there for you...

.....Always by your side.....

.....And you know you'll NEVER WALK ALONE.....