The Problem with Scientists

13.6.2007
1341hrs AEST GMT+0800
Law Library

From 2mr it will be 1 wk to my exams.. and also 1 wk to my freedom.. my motivational levels have been very PMSy. There're days where I feel so charged up and ready to go.. other days where I feel like a spent shell ejected from the firing chamber.. today.. I feel neither.. for some reason I feel rather neutral today.. I just know that at the end of the day, I'm more than happy to haul my tired ass home to my welcoming mother and bed.. I guess thats one of the downsides of having 2 weeks extra to study.. dont get me wrong.. I very much appreciate this 2 weeks of revision.. its just the level of being psyched up seems to lose its flavour. There are times at night when I'm tired but I just can't go to sleep.. the day's work keeps repeating in my head.. for some reason I do fall asleep and the next thing I know, I hear Majulah Singapura- my alarm clock rings and its time to get up again to go to the library.. haha.. oh well.. OK THIS IS SO NOT EMO!

Anyway in response to Air JonLai's Post on THE PROBLEM WITH ARCHITECTS, i present to you: the problem with Scientists! (refer to referances)

LEGAL DISCLAIMER: This article is written by a disgruntled scientist who has spent the past few weeks studying at the library for Molecular Cell Bio and Pathology (the LAW library.. not even the BIOMEDICAL library cos its totally crummy..), does not represent views of other scientists(definitely not Madelin.. she's too smart) and should seriously not be taken seriously... seriously.. more importantly, the scientist is definitely not emo..

The following article has been classified SIAN (Serious Inspiration from A Nerd). It contains:

-A modified (pimped out) entry from JonLai's blog (for original text refer to www.jonsbigheads.blogspot.com)
-A obvious lack of creativity
-A very negative view of scientists
-No emo songs
-A incredible amount of randomness
-Lameness beyond human comprehension

It is not intended for:
-People who have finished their exams
-Architects- cos they'll make fun of scientists
-Emo people (thats what snow patrol is for)
-People who have something better to do
-The Melbourne Model (thats right.. DREAM ON Melbourne Uni!.. dreamlarge.edu.au)


Viewer Discretion Applies


Abstract:

=THE PROBLEM WITH SCIENTISTS=

Scientists are the most clueless people even with the hugest and most brilliant brains in the world. They can say " up to this point, we still don't know how it happens" nearly all the time, and still are not thought of as ignorant fools- but still revered as knowledgable scholars. Needless to say, they possess an incredibly funky view of the world. They can be clueless and still believe that they have the power to manipulate life and play God. They throw words and acronyms at you thinking that its really cool- almost half the time, they're aiming to impress you with HUGE WORDS like IDIOPATHIC THROMBOCYTOPENIA PUPURA or intricate cellular signalling pathways. My professor thought me on the matter of intracellular signalling-

"MAP (Mitogen Activated Protein) Kinase Kinase Kinase(Raf-1) phosphorylates MAP Kinase Kinase(MEK) which phosphorylates MAP Kinase"

And you'll say "WTH!"- Wow Thats High effeciency signalling!

Yes, a scientist is much smarter than a doctor because he is a brilliant thinker, a dreamer and a stoner all at the same time. A scientist CAN walk around blankly, unlike architects- cos they're either still clueless or had smoked too much weed. His gaze is like a blank stare cos he's seriously stoned by weed and by his work. In an instant, he draws hypotheses and conclusions about the concentration and dose of the weed that he smoked- and its efficacy.. and also whether it was a rip off or not.. Such is his GREAT insight.

That was me at the start of the year. Throughout the semester, I as a scientist, have been strongly thought of as "uncool" by lots of non-scientists (especially xiao xi.. who does SCIENCE (but psych.. pfft.. Pseudo-scientists) and Elenor who does LAW..), whether because of jealously or for fun, its definitely both. Scientists generally agree with me- we're totally cool man.. RADICAL DUDE.. we put DA MAJOR GROOVE in DNA(there's also the minor groove). The scientists that don’t are definitely bland and nerdy, they might as well study medicine, who really cares?

But still, one of the biggest problem with scientists is that, without any experimentation or statistical data (contrary to the protocol of science), we know we're cool.. the only other problem is... that well... we're not always right.. and umm.. well we.. uhh.. kinda lack experiments and umm.. the.. how do you say... statistical data? and up to this stage we still dont know how it happens..

Ok i am still clueless..


Referances
Lai, J. 2007 " The Problem with Architects" 1st Edition, www.jonsbigheads.blogspot.com


p/s Have any of you checked out the Bruker Daltonics Nuclear Magnetic Resonance(NMR) Spectroscopy machine at Bio21?(I swear the people at Bio21 are NERDY and have lots of money!) its DEFINITELY not as hot as the ginger-soy-wasabi girl at Plush Fish @ union house(BUT WHO CARES?!) OF COURSE IT IS NOT AS HOT! its cooled by liquid nitro to about 3 K (-274'C).. urrgh I miss the smell of 99.97 w/v absolute ethanol from the flammables cabinet..

Cheers Jon.. :P